Past Musings 8:58 a.m. 2003-04-17 From an entry on February 9, 2003(this was one of the precursors to my starting this on-line diary!):
I went to see Adaptation this evening, and it was really good! I especially liked the part where he was talking to himself about being a loser, and trying to coax himself into writing "just one page" for a reward of a muffin. Also, there were these great scenes where he would psyche himself into doing these things - "I'm going to get out of the car and kiss that girl - go after her..." - then pause, and drive off!
He also attends a screenwriters seminar, given by the guy who wrote "Story" - I will have to ask my therapist, who’s an aspiring screenwriter (and I think has that book) if he has seen it.
All of this has given me inspiration to start my own writing. I decided I would begin writing a reflection of my career so far as a teacher. Farther than that - an intertwining of my experience in education. As a student, a failed teacher, a teacher who is surviving, and as a person who yearns for recognition and glamour in her life, which is defined by being a teacher.
I really like this - I have already done one search for paintings about teaching, and I want to include references to teacher shows, such as Boston Public, and other influences like The Prime of Miss Jean Brodie and Up the Down Staircase. I want to be completely honest, and be able to talk about the day to day struggles and failures (such as losing my temper with a student the other day – yelling at him) and the successes (a great inspiration for a lesson plan, a student actually showing appreciation) of working in a system where "no child is left behind" but teachers increasingly are.
Not knowing that I was really going to go into education, I was influenced at an early age by teachers. Both of my parents were teachers, and I was a major teacher's pet, constantly seeking approval from my teachers. I also was a student, and although I was a good student, I am know that I have committed the errors that many of my students do on a daily basis. I also had to go back to school in my 30's - not as fun an experience as I had thought it would be.
I have thought about setting up an new, "anonymous" online diary, so that my rants and reminiscences could be read by others, but I just got back from a blog site, which gave a pretty strong caveat about posting an online diary (Note: that person was having “stalker” trouble, but seems to be okay, now. In any case, she still has the blog!). Ouch! On the other hand, I am dying to try out templates, and having a "cool" diary that others can visit - here's my chance to be famous! Or infamous!
I want to give it some thought, but I am really frustrated about my seeming inability to finish anything that is not directly involved with my classroom obligations. At least that is one thing I have learned about survival as a teacher - be SURE your ass is covered! But there also has to be more to life!
© Tiedyefor 2003